There Comes a Time for More Learning

There is a passage in Baron Baptiste's book, 40 Days to Personal Revolution that reads,

"The truth is that we reach a moment where we've read the books, done the workshops, followed this teacher or that one, and then we need to just be the change.  More education is not always the solution.  What is needed is a special kind of awakening that brings you to understand things for yourself.  Dropping your brain means to rediscover, trust, and grow from this blessed state-which the ancient ones called living by faith."

When I first started teaching, which was a little over a year ago, I thought that I had to know everything.  I had spent over 200+ hours studying directly under Baron at bootcamps, I downloaded all the Baptiste Power Yoga podcasts that I could find online to practice from, I listened to the Monthly Magic CDs, I ordered probably 20 or so books from the internet on self-help, yoga assisting, Sanskrit (the language yoga is based on), yoga for women, yoga for Christians, and the list goes on.   I became obsessed with being the perfect teacher.  I began studying these Bootcamp in a Box flashcards so that I could learn the Sanskrit names of the poses for my classes and I became obsessed with saying the right things during class.  I also made a point to get on my yoga mat everyday to feel the poses in my body, but I started to realize I was on my mat as a teacher, with a goal in mind, rather than as a student with a beginner's mind.  

While listening to the Teacher's Insights CDs, one of the insights Baron mentions is to stop studying, stop going to workshops, stop reading, and start teaching by faith.  I don't remember when exactly I actually opened up my ears and heard this, but it has transformed my teaching.  Between last fall and this spring, I haven't gone to any workshops, I stopped listening to the CDs, and stopped reading self-help and yoga books.  I haven't practiced much outside of my own solo practice but this has given me a chance to truly explore myself on my mat.  As I have seen stress arise on my mat, resistance set in, and frustration take over me, it is from this place that I am a better teacher.  No books would be able to teach me this, knowing Sanskrit wouldn't have enlightened me on my mat, and as my students make weird faces when I call out poses in Sanskrit, I know changing the language doesn't make my students feel enlightened.   

Last week, a few of my students mentioned that they noticed a difference in me - energetically, and just my style of teaching since they first started coming to class.  It was all constructive feedback, which I value, and I hope that I continue to evolve and change as a teacher.   I feel like I'm at that point now where I need more coaching and more education.  So, the last weekend of March, I headed up to the Yoga Journal Conference in Lake Geneva and got a little fill of some different teaching styles.  I attended three, 2-hour Vinyasa Classes.  

The first class was Hip-Hop Power Yoga with Ian Lopatin.  To get the weekend started, this class was AWESOME.  Ian's playlist mirrored my own so I was in hip-hop yoga heaven.  I'm not used to practicing with music, so this was a major change for me.  I found myself singing to the music while I was on my mat, and I felt like I could really just let go.  I think this is what makes me like training for triathlons so much too, actually.  When I can rock out on my bike or on a run, I just let go of a lot of tension and I feel free in my own body.  I am looking forward to Friday's in the fall when I add a rock-it-out Power Yoga class to my evening schedule.  

The second class was Salutations to the Sun, Moon and 5 Elements with Wade Morissette.  Wade is an amazing yoga teacher and an even better musician.  Within the context of the salutations, all of the students chanted together with him playing on the acoustic guitar, "Om Narayana Shanti Om."  He told us what the chant meant at the beginning of class but I don't remember what it meant, but I will forever remember how it made me feel singing it aloud with 50+ other yogis.  I was moved to tears in the first couple salutations.  I was filled with such a sense of gratitude for the ability to be on my mat, experiencing something so simple, so powerful, and so real.  

The next class was Empower Yoga with Seane Corn.  Seane is well known in the yoga community for her activism, her feminism, her detailed alignment and her amazing way with words.  I didn't know what this meant until I got a chance to experience her.  Talk about a powerful woman!  This class was an intermediate class filled mostly with yoga teachers.  Seane didn't pull out anything funky, she stuck with a basic flow and focused on alignment and powerful messages within the poses.  Everything was so simple, her cues so succinct, and her way with words so empowering.  I walked out of the room feeling a lot more open, likely due to some long holds in pigeon:), and feeling reassured that I don't need to pull out any fancy stops to help my students reach their edge.  

Just this weekend a few students of mine and I had the opportunity to go to a master class with Gregor Singleton at Om on the Range, a Baptiste Affiliate Yoga Studio, in Chicago.  First off, hats off to Beth and Terry Kiely for building such an amazing community in Chicago.  The energy in the studio demonstrated the power that yoga has to bring people together to better themselves and ultimately our world.  I stepped onto my mat excited to practice, but thoroughly exhausted after a long workout earlier that day.  I found myself taking it easier on myself in poses and being okay with it.  Sure, my reactive side showed up too.  Similar to Seane's class at Yoga Journal, Gregor didn't pull out any crazy poses.  He taught us about accessing poses in different ways and using our bodies as a vessel for expressing our truth in the form of love.  Sure, it sounds a little cheesy but seriously, when you are spent like I was on Friday and every part of your body and mind finally chooses to surrender, what is left is the truth - our authentic selves.   This is the place from which we should live.  We give without expectations, we care for our body for the temple it is, we are kind to others because we know it's right, we are at cause with our life.  When we put away all of the resistance, the anger, the upsetting things in our life, we are left with truth.  We find our truth on our yoga mat.  This is what makes yoga so amazing!  When we get away from our truth, we simply step back on our mats and find it.  

All of these workshops were amazing learning experiences for me.  Most importantly, I learned that as long as I teach by faith I have the power to empower others and be the change that I wish to see in the world.  People often ask me how I have enough energy to teach so many classes each week and my answer is simple...I'm being myself.  It's easy to be myself.  It's so much more draining to put on a performance - teaching new fancy poses that I haven't yet experienced in my body, calling out poses in Sanskrit that I'm not really sure of, and telling stories that aren't my own.  Trying to be something I'm not, now that's freaking draining.  Imagine what would happen in our life if we always lived by faith, by our truth....the possibilities are endless.  

Yoga Bootcamp

This weekend we held an all-day yoga bootcamp at Power of Your Om.  Dave Farmar, a Certified Baptiste Power Yoga teacher from Denver, Colorado came out to lead the day.  Adrienne assisted the long morning practice and practiced with the class in the afternoon.  Talk about an amazing, powerful day.  Including the instructors, we had 30 people in attendance over the course of the day!  Some students were very new in the practice (less than 5 classes), some had been practicing for a few months, some a few years, some new to the studio, some who have been coming since it opened.  

Here is what the day looked like: 

We got started at 8:15am with a little get to know you discussions with the group then on to meditation and a long, sweaty, flowing Baptiste practice.  When we got to the balancing series, many people started feeling a little woozy so while in tree pose, everyone had a chance to balance on one leg and eat grapes and oranges.  What a perfect combo - trees and life-giving fruits!  We wrapped up the morning session at 12:15 and had lunch catered in from Borrowed Earth Cafe in Downers Grove.  It was so yummy and perfect fuel for another afternoon session.  We began the afternoon with a short discussion about the morning practice.  There were some awesome breakthroughs in the morning practice - the realization that we don't need to beat ourselves up as punishment for the past, tears of release, giggles of elation in wheel, breaking free from old holding patterns, and lots of laughter.  After sharing, it was on to our mats for an afternoon of serious hip openers and a little inversion work.  We ended with a mild frog - only 15 minutes (as opposed to the 30-45 minute ones at the week long bootcamps).  

A wonderful community has been built in this space.  When I opened Power of Your Om over eight months ago, my goal was to create a space for people to come explore and express themselves.  I have this along with a community where people are supportive of themselves and supportive of each person that walks in the door.  Thanks to everyone who made this day possible, and those who continue to bless the studio with your presence.   

Bootcamp just ended and people are already asking when the next one is going to be.  I will keep you posted.  

I love my students

This week I got pretty sick, which in the 7 months I've been opened hasn't happened.  Considering all the people I'm in contact with on a daily basis, it's quite surprising.  I'm a crazy germ-a-phobe and wash my hands all the time, use antibacterial wash, wipe down all the switches and such with antibacterial wipes and keep the studio really clean.   That being said, after the 6am class on Monday I wasn't feeling like my usual self.  I thought it was something I ate on Valentine's Day - some heavy food my body wasn't used to....that wasn't the case.  During the 9:30am class, I was feeling really woozy and I had to sit down after abs and teach from the floor.  I was not feeling hot.  

I cancelled classes on Monday night and Tuesday morning as a result of me not feeling good.  I received so many emails from my students telling me to take it easy, to rest, and get well.  It was just a flu bug, but the sympathy I received from everyone was overwhelming.  I was feeling better on Tuesday, but not good enough to teach, so I turned on an audio class for my students to practice but I couldn't teach.  I did the same thing for my 6am and 9:30am class on Wednesday.  I'm so thankful that everyone was understanding.  I felt good today and was able to teach my night class.  After being off of my mat for a few days, I felt a little out of it, but class was still great!   

It's not difficult to run a business like this when I have students that are so amazing, so caring, and grateful of me showing up.  I will say, that it is challenging to do this without other teachers - a substitute at the least.  I'm excited for the possibility of a few of my students to go to teacher training in May.  I'm looking forward to growing the class times, having more teachers, growing the community and holding the space for each student and teacher to grow to their fullest potential.  

Thank you for giving me this amazing opportunity.  You are all so amazing!  

Revolutionize Yourself

On Sunday afternoons, for a taste of something different, I offer audio classes at a reduced price to students.  I turn on one of my favorite Baptiste teachers' podcast classes and I practice with the class.  I was hesitant at first to do this because I didn't want people to be turned off by the fact that there isn't an actual teacher "teaching" the classes, but I decided to go for it and give it a try. I've been offering this class for the last 5 weekends and the turnout has been great.  So far, we've listened to Baron Baptiste, Kinndli McCollum, and Philip Urso.  Each teacher brings a different flair to the class.  Many of the students have started to notice the similarities in my teaching with these teachers, which is awesome because I consider them to be my greatest teachers.  

Today we did a class where we ended with Yoga Nidra.  Yoga Nidra means yogic sleep.  It is a state of conscious deep sleep.  In meditation, you remain in the waking state of consciousness, and gently focus the mind, while allowing thought patterns, emotions, sensations, and images to arise and go on.  However, in Yoga Nidra, you leave the waking state, go past the dreaming state, and go to deep sleep, yet remain awake.  

I have never done Yoga Nidra before but am so thankful for this experience.  It was such an amazing Sunday afternoon treat! This was an extra special, unexpected treat because this weekend was so crazy busy!  Aren't our lives all crazy busy?!?!  We can use this deep relaxation all the time!  Seriously!!!  So many of us wait until we are so worn down to start a revolution inside of ourselves, but why do we wait that long?  We get worn down, we turn to poor choices in diet, poor choices in exercise (or lack there of), poor choices in how to relax, we take care of everyone else but ourselves, and we continue on this vicious cycle that we claim will end "someday."  If I had a $1 for every time I hear that, I would be going on vacation to yoga bootcamps every other week!  If we wait for someday to come, we will be waiting forever.  

What is that "some thing" that you've always wanted to do but have been waiting for that "some day" to come?  Can you make a commitment to yourself that you will do it?  Can you put it down on paper and commit yourself to a date to have it completed?  If not now, then when?  Life is not a dress rehearsal...this is all we've got!  So get at it!!!   

40 Days to Personal Revolution

This new year, I am facilitating a program at my studio called 40 Days to Personal Revolution.  This program is based on the book, "40 Days to Personal Revolution" by Baron Baptiste.  The program consists of daily yoga practice, meditation, diet/nutrition, and personal journaling.  A lot of other Baptiste Affiliate studios have done this program with their students.  It has been a great way to encourage students to take a holistic view on their health, and their lives - physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  

I am doing the program with the students as well as facilitating.  The program has been an amazing learning experience for me about myself, what holds me back, what I obsess about, what takes me away from presence, where I catch myself in my story, and it has also been a great challenge.  Last year, I did the 30 Day Bikram Yoga Challenge.  That challenge, while tough, was only about the physical practice of yoga.  This challenge encompasses so much more.  Yoga is not something that is done just on your yoga mat.  Our yogic mind, life and way of being are reflected everywhere we go - from the small physical challenges, to the enormous emotional challenges we don't even know we are having.  

There have been some major success stories of the program and it's not even over yet.

1. Several women have lost more than 9 lbs.  Not because that was their goal when they walked in the door, but because they made a conscious decision to care for their bodies.  Taking a 360 degree approach to health makes the world of difference.  
2. If there hasn't been weight loss triumphs, many participants have noticed a dramatic difference in their bodies by increasing their yoga practice to 6 days each week.  Their clothes are fitting better, they are leaner, standing up taller, and they have a glow about them that they didn't have upon first walking in the door on January 4th.  
3.  Addictions are gone!  Many of us began with an addiction to something - coffee, pop, wine, snacking, etc.  Some of us have gone from drinking 4 huge mugs of coffee each day to none!  This isn't because we have to do it, it's because we have built awareness of our habits.  
4. We completed a 3 day fruit fast.  Many people's first ever cleanse/detox/fast program.  
5. We are meditating daily to clear our mind and realize that we are not our thoughts.  - The meditation has shown to be the most challenging of the entire program due to the fact that we live in a society where "doing" has defined us.  
6. We are committing ourselves to take time for ourselves.  Our journey has shown us that our fast-paced, action-packed days do not give us much time for us.  We spend our lives serving others, which is wonderful, but it is important to take some time to rest, restore, and revive ourselves so we can be more available to everyone.  

These are just a few examples of the changes that have taken place over the course of less than 40 days.  Seriously...it's been only a month and so much has shifted for so many of us.  When we take the time to give to ourselves, we are better able to give of ourselves to others.  It's not easy to put ourselves first for this length of time, but through the support of our families, our belief in ourselves, and dropping our struggles we have been seen amazing growth.  

I am an Ironman!

Thank you so much for your support over the past few months, and especially last weekend.  Whether you were able to come or not, I wanted to share the experiences of the weekend! I'm fulling recovered now after taking the weekend to relax.

I cannot tell you how much it means to me to have such a wonderful family and a fabulous group of friends that wake up at the crack of dawn, spend the entire day searching for me, worrying about me, cheering really loudly for me, making and carrying around heavy signs for me, shaking your cowbells and pompoms, getting others around you to cheer loudly for me, tracking me online, leaving me awesome voicemails and texts of encouragement, yelling at me to hurry up in the port-a-potty, spending your whole weekend or just parts of it – JUST FOR ME. Really, it is so amazing to me and it means more than I can ever put into words. Every bit of support you give me kept me going. Everyone always says that I make it look easy because I’m always smiling and I look strong. Your enthusiasm for me made me smile, and helped me to dig deep to find the real me inside whenever the negativity or pain would set in. There were so many points where I wasn’t feeling that great...but the high points outweigh the low points and I could not have made it through without your cheers!

So...the results are in. I placed 4th in my age group and earned a spot for the Ironman World Championships in Kona, Hawaii October 10th, 2009. (I thought it was November-yikes!) And yes... I am going. This is one of those things you just don’t pass up!

Ironman Sunday will be etched into my mind forever. The little things like the sign that said “If you can read this, your are going to slow,” some guy named Joe who shouted out his phone number to me over the megaphone, running through my old stomping grounds in Madison, remembering my first run with Andy on the lakeshore path on a day that he was totally hungover in college, my cheering squad losing their voices because they were cheering so loud, Butch standing on a light post or something with his arms in the air shouting at me, slapping Taavi’s hand on State St., my dad telling me I was 27th and not having a clue what that meant, JP (Caryn’s dad) telling me I was now 3rd in my age group, not freaking out at the swim start, the amazing support of all the participants on the race especially a fellow biker and fellow runners who really pushed me when I was struggling, being treated like a V.I.P. all weekend, kissing Andy as I started my run, and finally getting to see the finish line on my second loop and encouraging the crowd to cheer for me as I crossed the finish line and heard Bill Reiley say “Adrienne Saeger...You are an Ironman!” This sport is truly spectacular!

The entire time I was swimming, biking or running I kept myself calm by reminding myself that I'm doing what I love. I love to swim, I love to bike, I love to run...and I do really love putting them all together to see how far I can go, how much my body can take. I experienced every range of emotions this weekend. I was filled with anxiety and nerves before the race. I got frustrated and down on myself during the run - several times! I started with smiles and cheers for the other runners (especially the women), and then I got crabby and didn't smile or cheer anyone on anymore. Andy popped up all over the run course though and every time I saw him, I smiled and reminded myself that I had a choice of how I would respond to the situation I was in... be happy and enjoy it, or struggle and miss out on all the range of emotions I felt. I went back and forth between the two over the course of the marathon. I'm human. I got the chills a few times while I was running when I realized what I was going to accomplish on Sunday. When I crossed the finish line, I was so pumped up. I visualized crossing that finish line so many times. Getting there was so sweet!

All the grueling long workouts, all the months of training were forgotten and Sunday came and went so fast. Today still, I don’t feel like I finished an Ironman-maybe that’s why people keep doing them! It’s so surreal. But I have to tell you more about Monday. We went to the Terrace at 10:45 this morning to see what was up with the Kona spots. All spots had to be claimed by 11:00am. Well, first off I looked at the board and thought that I read that the first 4 finishers in the W25-29 age group made it. My stomach jumped into my lungs, and my heart skipped a beat. Then I realized I was looking at the M25-29. But just then Andy said that the 2nd place girl in my age group has not claimed her spot yet and she is the only one of all the women in all age groups that has not claimed it. I started to get super nervous. Andy stood behind the girl who sat at the table who was in control of the Kona spots. He was pacing and I told him he was freaking me out....and she said, “yeah, he’s freaking me out too!”
It was then 10:56, 10:58 and then they called last call and nobody took it. The room then filled with about 75 people all in hopes of getting a spot for Kona. He announced that there was only one female spot available and it was in the W25-29 age group. He then announced my name and I stood up with one fist pumped in the air and a huge smile on my face and everyone started cheering. I went to the table to sign a form and pay for my entry with totally shaky hands, and then went over to Andy and just lost it. I couldn’t believe what just happened. We were both in tears. Not in a million years had I thought that I would be heading to Hawaii for the World Championships. This is so unbelievable!

I’m taking some time off from training to do more yoga, cook some real meals, maybe finish the scrapbook from my honeymoon, and spend some more time with my dear friends. I'm looking forward to all of this. After having a week to chillax, I am already getting antsy to train again.

Everyone always asks, “WHY do you do this?” And the answer is... “Because I know I can.” Digging deep can be so hard but events like this really teach me that all things are possible when we believe in ourselves.

I love you all!